Yeah, yeah, I know it's been like a month or so since I posted. Been busy working on really important stuff like driving my new car (pics to come if it ever stops raining/snowing/sucking in central Ohio, working on some home improvementy kind of projects, catching up on reading (check out Conn Iggulden's Genghis -- he's beginning yet another awesome series about a guy who ends up dominating a significant part of the world). Anyway, I've been enjoying the hell out of myself because this season I am DVRing not one, not two, but THREE shows on television. Yes, Patti has THREE shows she likes. Naturally, LOST is on there, and Ghost Hunters as well. But really my true Dirty Little Reality Show Addiction is...

Top Chef.

Oh yeah, baby, I said it. I got hooked on it last season, when I discovered it during a late-night remote control surf session, and I've been stuck on it ever since -- and yes, damn it all to hell, Dale Levitski got totally robbed in the final episode... I <3 Dale and wish I had a gay brother I could hook him up with. Part of it is that I love the food -- who knew you could do so many different things with a whisk and a jar of balsamic, or make quinoah into something fun? I love to cook and try new stuff, so this is perfect.

I adore the judges and have a secret crush on Anthony Bourdain. He's snarky and crass and smokes too much, but dear dog, he says what we're all thinking ("That's the worst thing I've ever put in my mouth"). Tom Colicchio is slightly more polite, but tells it like it is. Padma Lakshmi is a bit annoying, but she's clearly not stupid, so you can overlook the fact that she often says things she's not really qualified to say at all. Guest judges pop in periodically -- in addition to Bourdain, there's Rocco diSpirito (who's not only an awesome chef, but nice on the eyes), and Ted Allen, who always makes me laugh. 

Then there are the contestants. Some you hate, some you love, and some... well, some surprise you. Kiwi Mark and his Marmite pizza... wtf? And yet it seemed to work, and he managed to redeem himself from his disastrous almost-elimination in Ep1, by cooking some serious Vulture Food in Ep2. I adore the couple from San Fran, Jen and Zoi -- I think Jen is a far stronger cook than Zoi, and she's probably not going home any time soon. Andrew is cocky and hyperactive, but clearly showed that he knows what he's doing when he doesn't let his ego get in the way. Dale is trying really hard to be this season's Hung, but hasn't yet impressed me with either his attitude or his skills. Ryan just seems lost, and Erik is out of his element, although not with the sense of desperation that we saw in last season's Howie.

My picks for the top contenders? Mark and Andrew for sure. I think Stephanie has a lot of potential if she steps outside her comfort zone and lives a bit more dangerously -- playing it safe is going to bite her in the ass. Antonia and Nikki look good too -- and Richard will do well if he stops trying to impress people with his "molecular gastronomy" (a phrase that makes me want to molecularly vomit). 

I can't wait till next Wednesday. 

Oh, and for those of you who think there's no way you'd enjoy a show about people cooking, there's always the Top Chef Drinking Game. Important game tip: eliminate the Padma rule, and watch out if Bourdain is on, because you could end up under the table by the :30 mark.